Friday, February 06, 2015

a lesson-

" a lesson hurt, before it teaches"
. . .

you told him, you can go through your life without him. And he said  "yes i know you will, because you spent almost of your childhood time living happily without me.  So why not now?". he smiled.

but you felt a great loss. 

after a big time of missing someone who you know already left you behind, your heart trying to find someone to fulfill the empty place in your heart. You hardly trying to fall in love again, and you succeed. But the truth is , you fall in love with the same person, exactly the same person just in a different time-and a different place. You give up your heart, And, after a while, the someone who you spent the most of your time thinking about, comes again in your life with a vow to complete your deen. 

" everything will fall into place-have faith to Allah and be patient "

. . .

The world we live never promise us the paradise. The world we live never consume us the happy ending. The world we live never provide us a shelter from the storm. We live in a world where everything's are uncertain, and only death is exceptionable.

i found myself pretty much sad these days. I bought a new red sneakers for myself, and i walk along the road. I suppose to walk somewhere , but i'm not. Because the time is just not too right for a really good thing to happen. 

after a while, i was sitting around the playground. Seeing the kids play hide and seek, and boys doing some tricks with their skateboard. I feel envy. Because they have nothing to worry about. In my head, i thought i was the worst ,full of problems without solution, being sick here and there, being push by all the problems in this world. While i was mourning on my self, one little girl crying, she was fallen from the bench while trying to hide from her mates. No one comes to get her up, no one comes to persuade. I wonder, does she come here alone? . So, i go and get her up. I trying to cheer her up by buying her an ice-cream. But she refused. She keeps crying. I felt like leaving her , but my feet won't let me walk away.

while i was wondering what to do, a woman with a red-tulips blouse come over and hugging this little kids. Oh, so this is the mother's , i thought so. And, i handling the girls over. She's thanked me for being so kind.

so. i had some chat with this young mothers. We talked a lot of things, and i felt terrible when she said that " my daughter have no father since birth",and she's selling some kerepek for money everyday. This beautiful young lady, was having a hard time but never feels burdened for what Allah had destined for her. How stronger she was. I'm totally envy .

That happy face, never shows how terrible her life was- i feel bad about myself.

" don't run a good today, by thinking about a bad yesterday"

. . .

i wrote this story because i think i have to do so. This story have no absolute relations with me, but for someone else, yes it does.

" you don't need another human being to make your life complete, Just be with someone who's seen you at your worst and still thinking that you're the best"

i know there's a lot of grammatical error, so that's why i have to stop writing before i turn into another broken English-story-teller. Lol  --"

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